Conflicts and realities within, a closer look

In life, its not the big things that matters, instead, the small gestures, show of emotions and stripping away the plastic moulds settled in ones life is more important. Even if not for all, Ramesh always felt it that way. Sometimes, when I listen to him, I too felt it many times that somewhere he is right.

Ramesh has been seriously committed with a girl and for some time now, struggling to settle and wrap his space around for this particular lady. He is always the mand of words and many times the same thing lands his mind in a conflict of thoughts.

Recently, he was so exhausted of what is happening in his life, he came to my room, sat on my bed leaving me to cook for both of us. I could see something running behind , in his thoughts and felt to give him some time and space.. I really wanted to help him with his trouble , so took him to his favorite spot, Jayanagar 5th Block cafe Day, where he started slowly sharing his problem.

The thing is that he feels his relation not working.. not working he feels. Since I knew a few things here and there, to an extent his thoughts were right. What he longed for a year or more is to have some time to unwind his mind and he just not able to do it with his love. It was as if, she do not want to know his feelings.. I do not know how much could i share here, still, sorry Ramesh, I am doing it for my mind to away from the conflicts.

Ramesh sited an incident happened yesterday while in conversation with his gal. She was mentioning about how much her sister spend on phone in the last year. She was too concerned and all, but he got something else in his mind. He had been frequent on phone and his situation also is the same. on mentioning she feels, its not similiar and need not be considered seriously.

While she left for her vacation, she declared as if to emphasize that she has become serious and more money -oriented. Well, he was not surprised for while she is away in her hometown, he cannot reach her frequently and the only option is for her to give a call once in a day. Obviously, again, money got a different value when itz her dad’s. 😦 Well, he nearly took a zero-charge reliance connection so that he could cut down his phone bills , but she seems not at all considerate to help him , cut down the bills.

Before I could nodd in agreement, Ramesh followed it up by saying, “it’s all fine. I am ok with it. But when it comes to sharing something, like for eg:- after I return from a business trip, the snaps I took or songs I copied to my gadget to share, never been of even a slightest interest for her.What more, the only thing one desires is spend QUALITY time, and you ended up chasing some wild goose in the town with her.

Well, dont know why ramesh feels , he is second always. but he is just having it get stronger day by day. He feels, lighted and sided. Well, its not his fault entirely. I do remember, sitting next to him, finding him giving ‘N’ calls just to know in which train she is or has boarded and she was just mentioning time of her train. I was also wondering, with out name or which station , how my friend was going to know. He was clueless and he felt terribly lighted. I somehow got him out of that experience and it was not the first, though few more occasions again came where she did the same. But, he became like her for she he thought, prefers to be like that.

I sometimes laugh at him, when I find him having his dinner quickly and planning to drop to the cafe he is very fond of some 1 km away… But when he just reaches back after a few hours, he would always be with headache, but this time, I took it to asking him, why you always come burnt ? What is it happening and he replied,’ Its not that one should wish something , but when he doesnt get it every now and then, its better keep less wishes. I went there to spend some time, chat, get some photos that I never saw from her, though late when her friends make a comment on it. Actaully, those photos if I had seen before, I would not have let her share with her friends online , not at least before me seeing those. Well, again I happen to be the second. I am ok again, but the most wished for is again a small favor, some time with me.” I had to get him off again and so I tried to wind it up saying, ” after all if that is what u wished for, sure you had some time , leave those photos she didnt shared with you or etc”

‘Well, he replied, ‘even that didnt happen. She was up with some findings that I commented compliments to some girl in orkut, I commented another girl and a lot. Actually, my orkut is always accessible for her with my login credentials and I got nothing there to hide. She wants me to change and insists she is trying to change me. The only thing , in the talk I heard was taunts and tease and a courtesy tone for spending time with me. I am near to done.. If i ask her to send an SMS , in the night or on occasions when I cannot reach her or keep me updated, she quips that she dont SMS. Instead she prefers gving a call. Still many occasions happened and an SMS would have helped , still she would underline with a question, ” Do you want me to change? I dont think one should change a person so that he could love her and all” . What should I reply?

And now the same person , spends hours taunting and shouting , for she does all this for ramesh to change. Change that too what, his some friends that too just countable he got. All the friends, especially college mates or colleagues he got as friends in time, do reserve a lot of value to his thoughts and I think, he might have left them back , including me , if his girl instead of taunts and trying to change , give him some quality time.

Again my friend is dressing up, this diwali, for another walk for none of the cafe is open and one that is open and his favorite is 1 Km away, might be to come back fed up :(. Yesterday, he was mentioning that the time she said, he was there but she was amidst a movie and so seemed not much interested for a time with him. By the time, movie got over, she was ready for the kill. Once she is done, she got commitmetns with her friends to go out for shopping. Now after an hour, few minutes before he got a call to come online at 7:30 PM. And he is again running, for he just wants is a pinch of time for being together… which i dont think, he would get this time also 😀

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One Response to “Conflicts and realities within, a closer look”

  1. saffrongeek Says:

    This is a private post and is not listed for public…

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